When environments get to be too much for me I resort to stimming. Though resort is an odd word choice. It implies stimming is my last choice which it is not, but it is the last choice others would choose for me. How I stim depends on what is happening, or what drives me to […]
Expressing Myself Through Pictures
Emoting is difficult for me. Sometimes I can’t recognize emotions, sometimes I feel too much. Most times I feel too little. But nature has always been a place where I feel best. I feel so many different things in nature. It’s a grounding experience that always humbles me. I remember where I am in space […]
How I survive the Holidays
Holidays have always been hard for me. Too many sights, smells, and sounds. Too many specialty Holiday foods with strange textures and stronger tastes. Still the fall and winter months are my favorite and I have developed coping strategies to deal with the more boisterous side of winter and it’s Holidays. The cold weather is […]
Foto Fridays
I love taking pictures inches from the ground. Seeing the world from as small a perspective length as possible is what I want to do with macro photography. It made macro photography interesting in the first place. Seeing those details on an object so small, makes my mind race with possibilities. I want to go […]
Foto Friday
I just started another part time job, they are all I seem able to keep. I used to feel shame for that fact. My time is precious to me, too precious to spend doing a disliked activity for 8 hours a day. Why can’t our time be spent in nature? Where we can see while […]
Humans are Social, I am not
“Hell is Other People.” John-Paul Satre Imagine you’re in a glass chamber. With all the walls clear and a whole crowd just surrounding you and the chamber. The crowd is only made up of eyes though, and they are all trained directly on you. Every motion you make they track. Any word that leaves your […]
Diagnosis: Did I Know?
2016 saw me diagnosed with Autism and ADD. At that point it came as no surprise. I had just failed my senior thesis class. For the second time. Schooling had always been manageable for me. I didn’t apply myself but that was never a problem outside of math. The way high school worked had many […]
Photo Friday
I spent the day outside, in a capacity unfamiliar to me. Writing and reading are how I spend my days normally, the location doesn’t matter. Today was different. I crawled around my backyard and took pictures. Bugs crawled past me or over me and I didn’t care. All that mattered was the world behind my […]
My First Blog Post
A Bearded Man We can lift ourselves out of ignorance, we can find ourselves as creatures of excellence and intelligence and skill. — Richard Bach “Jonathan Livingston Seagull” Adulthood feels like it’s just begun for me. I finished university a year ago, was diagnosed with autism two years before that, and came out as trans […]
My name is Joseph
I watch my feet when I walk. Always have. I’ve learned my feet have a mind of their own when left out of my sight. ‘Look at your feet or trip and fall,’ became my internal monologue. My father let me know my behavior was Normal, to a certain point. He also let me know […]
Joseph Stumbles in His Shoes 